Preparing for an Unmedicated birth? Start here.

Mar 11

Feb 7

When I was a first time mom preparing to give birth I was getting a lot of different opinions on how I should go about this. On one end my family encouraged me to go unmedicated and on the other my doctor and coworkers encouraged me to get an epidural saying things like, “ you wont get a medal for not getting an epidural” “ I don’t understand why you would want to go through labor without medication if its available” “ it's your first, you don't’ know what your getting yourself into, so just get an epidural.” I had no way of knowing the tools I needed or how to find them. So I wanted to do that for you ! Below are 5 things that I wish I knew about preparing to have an unmedicated birth. When you are intentional about your desires and can take the tangible steps it takes to get there, then you my friend can do this too.

The first thing that is helpful is your mindset. It truly is a game of how mindful you can be about what you want, why you want it. How can you come back to your why when you are in the intensity and questioning what made you even choose this to begin with.

Part of your mindset is peeling back the layers of programming and looking at the beliefs you have about birth and motherhood, then deciding which beliefs you want to keep and which ones you want to change. For example, you may have grown up in a household of women that have only had cesareans. So you've been told “ just prepare yourself for a cesarean” “the women in our family can’t give birth naturally” etc. That is a belief that your subconscious either chose to believe or not. If it is one you chose to believe then you will have to really examine that fear or belief and decide, do you want to keep it or change it?

Another belief could be that birth is painful, and you are crazy if you don’t want to get an epidural. The biggest reason women get epidurals is because they are afraid of the pain. Now, if you’re reading this it is because you want to avoid an epidural. So let me ask you this, how do you view the pain in labor? Is it helpful or hurtful? Are you wanting to avoid all sense of this word? Now, let me ask you this, can you view pain as a messenger, as something purposeful with the intensity of labor? How can you continue even when you are in the deep intensity, what would help you through those moments?

If we can view pain as a messenger it allows us to work with it. Maybe your back hurting during contractions will encourage you to change positions. Which then allows your baby to rotate into a more optimal position to be born. When you have a healthy mindset around labor and birth then you can view the natural rhythms of labor as normal and purposeful. Labor pain is not damaging, strong contractions means your body is healthy and responding perfectly to the hormones. Quick Story time. My friend was sharing with me her birth story ( which you can listen to here on my podcast). She was sharing how during the intense contractions she started to shift her words. During a contraction, she started saying “ thank you, thank you “ and that shifted the entire labor for her, and her daughter was born shortly after. Your mind is the most powerful thing and it is something you can decide to change at any moment, you just have to have the awareness and tools to do so.

The 2nd thing that I would suggest if your goal is to have an unmedicated labor is to EDUCATE yourself. When you know what is happening in your body and why, it will allow you to understand what is happening and give you the confidence to trust that what you are experiencing is exactly perfect. Taking a birth class, whether that is in person or online, you can find my birth class hybrid version and online here,
I don’t recommend taking a hospital birth class, they typically are teaching you how to be a “good patient” instead of a powerful woman who instinctively knows how to give birth. Watching videos from trusted resources and reading birth books that are meant for unmedicated births, I don’t recommend reading “ What to expect when you're expecting” The books I recommend to start with you can find here.

Podcasts are also a wonderful resource when preparing your mind for an unmedicated birth. There are many that share birth stories and some of practitioners that discuss pros and cons of birth interventions and discuss different studies and so much more! You can find my recommended resources for podcasts here.

The 3rd thing that I recommend doing if your goal is to give birth unmedicated is to understand your options around birth and postpartum. You may have heard the term “ informed consent” but consent means that you are agreeing to whatever they suggest. I like to say instead, Informed decision making. When you understand the risks, benefits, alternatives and what your intuition is calling you to do, then informed decision making will allow you to trust yourself to know what you want and don’t want. The other part of this is making sure the team you choose is supportive of your choices.

Which leads me into the 4th thing, support - choosing a supportive provider that completely believes in your ability to give birth. If you have an appointment and they make you feel like your choice to go unmedicated is unnecessary or silly, if they make you feel like your body will not go into labor on its own, talking about inductions just in case, that is a red flag. If you have to fight your provider the whole time you are in labor, and you are relying on your support person to save you, that's not going to help your experience. Women in labor are highly susceptible to messages, so be aware of who you are going to allow in your space. If you feel you have to have your mom , sister, MIL, aunt , grandma etc there because they want to be there , but the energy that they have may not be helpful, then my suggestion is to give them a different task in supporting you. Maybe it's making sure you have a hot meal to eat after birth, watching the kids or other pets, cleaning, coming over after to assist in other ways. Get creative. The energy in your space needs to be protected.

If your partner doesn’t trust birth, your body or is constantly bringing up what ifs, I highly recommend they take a birth class, read a book and join you on doing these things. I have also had partners write down their fears and discuss them with their midwife/ob. When you are able to explore the fears, it gives you more power to work with them. Doulas are also a great option if you are able to have one there. They are familiar with birth , trust birth and are able to help you and your partner notice red flags and how to navigate them.

The 5th thing that I would recommend is PRACTICE. Learn how to tap into your inner strength. Meditations, affirmations, movement and breathwork. Practice different labor and birth positions to give you muscle memory and be able to have an idea of what you like and don't like. Practicing these things also allows you to communicate to your partner on things they can do to and for you in labor. It can be hard knowing how to support someone going through labor if you don't know what to expect, or things to try. Practice breathing deeply as you go to the bathroom. This is a great way to familiarize yourself with the pushing breath. Breathing deep into your belly and exhaling forcefully ( like your blowing up a balloon) I go over pushing in depth in my birth class here. I can tell you and give you all the tools you need, however it is up to you to practice these things.

As a mom preparing to give birth it can feel really overwhelming with all the ‘shoulds’. So I want to share with you that your body really truly knows the way to get your baby earthside. The problem lies in the disbelief and trust that so many of us have. If you are someone that has never seen an unmedicated birth, you aren’t sure how to move your body or listen to your institution, it can make it more challenging. The trust factor needs to be there with yourself first. These things I'm sharing with you are to help build that. Take what you want, and trust that what gets absorbed is what you need and let the rest go. Just like when you wash your hair, you can stand under the running water as long as you’d like but no matter what your hair will only absorb the amount of water that it can , letting the rest wash down the drain.

This is not an exhaustive list but I hope this gives you some things that you can start exploring. Allow yourself to get curious about how you will be in labor. As someone that has seen many births, I will tell you that every single one of them has been different. Everyone builds their own way of coping , and it changes throughout labor. You too will be able to do this. When you understand how you may cope in labor, whether that be roaring, swearing, breathing, smiling, singing etc. You can trust in yourself to get you through each moment.

You got this! If you need any additional support Im always here